Three Steps To Lasting Change
To implement lasting change in our lives, it’s important to overcome the habitual, egoic thinking that
keeps us stuck. These three steps will help you accomplish that. So here they are:
1. Set a plan ahead of time
2. Plan and take action that sets you up for success
3. Identify and implement the actions as acts of self-love
The first step is to set the plan ahead of time. The reason this is often necessary is because the ego loves
to get involved at the time of action. The ego wants to talk you out of change for fear of the unknown
so, the first thing you want to do is relax the ego. Tell yourself, I’m not doing anything today, this is just a
plan for the future. The ego doesn’t do well with long-term thinking so it’ll relax and figure it can control
you at the time of implementation as it’s probably done in the past.
So, once your ego is relaxed you can begin to set a plan in place. I’ll use a daily meditation practice as an
example. In this step you can sit down on a Saturday and say: I’m not doing anything this weekend; I’m
simply putting together a plan for the future to start meditating regularly. When the time comes to
implement the change, don’t discuss it with your ego, don’t get into a conversation with your mind,
simply stick to the plan that you made while you were thinking clearly.
The second step is to come up with action steps that ensure success. They should be small, easy to
accomplish steps that are specific. Some examples would be to begin with 5 minutes of meditation each
morning before doing anything else. To set yourself up for success, you can set your alarm ahead of time
10 minutes earlier than you usually wake up. Make it a rule that other than going to the bathroom
briefly, you’re not allowed to do anything else before you meditate. You can’t look at your schedule,
your phone, the weather, think about your day, etc. Nothing is allowed to happen before you meditate
other than using the bathroom if necessary. If you need to power off your phone or put it on the other
side of the room or even in a different room, do that.
The third step is to understand why you’re doing what you’re doing. As with any positive change, it’s
based in self-love. The problem is that we don’t usually slow down enough to realize this or to make it
part of the conscious process we’re implementing. Why are you attempting to meditate daily? Some of
the reasons can include: learning to slow your mind down to bring more peace into your life, becoming
more even and less reactionary in life, having the ability to minimize roller-coaster emotions, etc.
Whatever your reasons are, they are based in self-love. You are attempting to implement something
positive in your life because you want a better experience in life. This is self-love. Know it and act from
This way when your ego attempts to bring in excuses and reasons to blow off what you intended to do,
you can stand up for yourself. Stand up and say: “no, I won’t make excuses, I’m worth more than that. I
deserve to be respected and I need to start by respecting myself. I made a choice to do this to enhance
my life and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” Stand firm in your self-love and don’t allow your ego to
make excuses to dismiss the changes you are making.
Not only will this process be effective in implementing new habits but you’ll also find your self-love and
self-respect rising because of the consciousness you’re bringing to it. Go make the positive changes that
you deserve and enhance your life experience – you deserve it!